m i safe?

Is'nt  that  the  question  everyone wants 2 be assured of.I want to live...i want to be assured that each and every member of my family is safe....dont you ...???

Yes we all do...

Atleast  i  want  2  fly  like  a free bird.Why mom calls  me at an average of 2 calls every hour....???

Why  i  have  to  be  afraid  of  a  guy  asking me for some address...???

Why i  have  to  look  below  my seat every time i  board  a bus...???

Why  i  have  to  look suspiciously  every other guy having beard...??

There  are  plenty  of  cases to consider.......but why i have to ????

Can't i  have  a  simple life.....we  have  enough  problems  to take care of....isnt it...??

26/11 the day i will never forget.I  was  just preparing for my sessionals.

Mama came and said"son bombay has been  attacked agai....".I  rushed  to  aaj tak and saw all the proceedings.All my sessional  preparations came to a standstill.I should have been doin my preparations but i couldnt.How could i....when some part of mine had been wrecked by so called terrorists.

October 2005 and september 2005,i witnessed both of them.

Since then,i have so many questions.I feel frightened to go  new delhi station and board route no 355 for my college.I am confused as i am not sure if its ok to smile or laugh.

When the news of 26/11 came in,i could feel how much mama was scared.She tried to hide it but i was pretty sure she was crying....crying for me,for my dad....just because she was not sure if we will be able to make it safe after the work we do everyday.

After  the  attacks on taj and oberoi hotels,the owners have gone for there own armed security.

But what about us.....we never stay in those hotels....i will  rather stay in a hotel like those in paharganj.They dont even have their  own cctv sets....making them vulnerable to any kind of terrorist attack.So what i have to do now...?? Nothing....i can't do nothing .....i am on the mercy of those devils,because i dont want to.....thats the way i(INDIANS) am.I always  weigh  current issues......

i neve  learn.....

i forget my past....

i neve prepare 4 d future....

i go to clg, attend classes ,discuss the issues and make a quick come back to have a cup of coffee because its chilly outta dere nd see some masala news in my so called television....

I have accepted i will always have a lyf full of fear.

I have accepted that i will live like a rat.

I have accepted that i will never act.

I have accepted that i will fold my eyes and let my  politician do whatever he wants to.

I have accepted that  even if my brother dies in an attack,i will just go 4 compensation.

But y????

Cant i change myself?????

Yes i can.......i can change myself.....

cum on its not the job of a politician to take care of my family.......its me who has 2 do the job.

I have to change myself.I do not want to concern about my neighbour,i just want to be sure of my family's  safety.I should do my part and in the end all those i's will become we.

Yes i am selfish,i m selfish just beacuse i want 2 be happy ......

i want to be loved.....i want to be safe.....

NOTE:HERE "I" REFERS TO "YOU".